IlliniHQ 2
General Category => The Deuce => Topic started by: Reacher on August 29, 2024, 12:42:48 PM
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That’s it. That’s the post.
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Who the fuck is Billy Horschel?
Oh. Golfer. Was he mean to you on Twitter or something?
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No, but nice leap you took there.
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Fucker literally does the opposite of what I want him to do EVERY. FUCKING. TIME.
Don’t play Billy Horschel, he lights it up. Play Billy Horschel, he sucks balls (huge ones). To play DFS effectively you have to have “forgiveness in your heart.” Meaning when a guy burns you, you keep going back when it makes sense. I keep going back and he fucks me with astonishing consistency.
I played him in my main lineup a few weeks ago (against my gut) and the fucker withdrew at 1:00 on Thursday. That’s practically unheard of! lol if a guy withdraws you are fucked. You can’t swap anyone out once the first guy has teed off.
I played him in my main two lineups today and so far he’s in last place. He did just make a birdie though, so maybe he’ll turn it around. He’s my primary nemesis is DFS golf.
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Dude was finding new inventive ways to hose me with the WD. Everyone was shocked he withdrew that late.
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There are only 30 players in the field. He’s tied for worst score going. He’s in 2nd to last because it’s the Tour Championship and they have a weird system that assigns certain guys a score before they tee off. It’s weird, but largely makes sense.
(https://i.postimg.cc/Y2LWZ4H6/IMG-8639.jpg) (https://postimages.org/)
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Damn, Wyndham Clark doing his best to match Horschel. I’m not worried about Wyndham, though. That dude will almost certainly make some birdies.
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The 1st hole is kicking ass and taking names. Lots of bogeys and double bogeys. Scheffler starts with a double and his two shot lead is gone after one hole.
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Jesus, Adam Scott at it again. Thought the fairy dust on his old ass would wane.
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Took out Shane Lowry to go to Horschel early this morning. SMH I know better than to change that late. Lowry is -1 and bogey free on a course where almost everyone is making bogeys.
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Oh, he fucked you in gambling. Well, I guess that should have been my first guess.
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Well, he hurt me in the feels wasn’t a bad one.
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Oh, he fucked you in gambling. Well, I guess that should have been my first guess.
Repeatedly!
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Wyndham knocks one to 3 feet for an eagle! Dude has serious horsepower. He’s today’s Phil Mickelson. He could shoot -5 with two doubles.
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He and Rory. But Rory has largely sucked (by his standards) the last two months or so.
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Horschel “leading” the field at +3!
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Lots of bogeys being made, lots of birdies being made (unless you’re Billy Horschel).
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Thankfully it’s a no-cut event. Hopefully he can get back on track.
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Studs and duds lineup for 50k to winner. Hope my studs can catch up to my duds.
(https://i.postimg.cc/Rh8m3jzW/IMG-8640.jpg) (https://postimg.cc/y3FttpxK)
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Man. So, just curious. How much does it cost to get in on this shit?
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I’m having a Pseudo Sue at the airport watching fucking tennis. What channel is it on?
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Man. So, just curious. How much does it cost to get in on this shit?
The lineups I play range from $1 to $25. I usually play about 5 $1, 3 $5, and 1 $25 lineup. So maybe $45 gets me started for weeklong.
But then there is showdown too (daily). Usually $20 for the main showdown and 2-3 more $1 lineups (per day). Even in a bad week I usually win some of it back. On a good week, I can make the whole year profitable. Winning 2k on The Masters basically ensured I’d break even this year at the very worst.
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https://www.cbssports.com/golf/news/2024-tour-championship-tv-schedule-live-stream-channel-where-to-watch-fedex-cup-playoffs-coverage/amp/
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The lineups I play range from $1 to $25. I usually play about 5 $1, 3 $5, and 1 $25 lineup. So maybe $45 gets me started for weeklong.
But then there is showdown too (daily). Usually $20 for the main showdown and 2-3 more $1 lineups (per day). Even in a bad week I usually win some of it back. On a good week, I can make the whole year profitable. Winning 2k on The Masters basically ensured I’d break even this year at the very worst.
Ok. So, sounds like you're just dicking around with this. So why start a thread about being pissed at a golfer? I'm still unclear.
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This week:
$25 lineup 200k to winner
$5 lineup 50k
$1 about 2k I think
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Ok. Well, good luck I guess. I don't know.
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Showdown (daily) typically:
$20 20-50k (much smaller field than weeklong)
$1 usually $400-$750 to winner
There are lots of other ranges too. That’s mostly what I play.
There are some contests with entry fees up to like $4,444
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PGA DFS is so much fun. I enjoy it even more than NFL DFS.
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I’ve literally had weeks where one-two putts was the difference between modest winnings or breaking even and big winnings.
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Sounds fun I suppose
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I’m sure I posted about it then, but at The Memorial had I played the right Canadian Adam at $6300 (imaginary player salary) I’d have won $117,000. I played Schenk instead of Hadwin and I think I broke even or won slightly.
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Schenk was the last guy in my lineup, at that point I was probably a one in four or five chance of picking the right guy.
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They even have .25 and .50 cent lineups if you want to dabble.
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The rest of the year isn’t the best time to start though, after this week they take a short two week break and slapdick season begins. Golf is weird. The season ends this week, but the new one starts a couple weeks later. Most of the big boys take the rest of the year off, though.
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As I said, Wyndham is not a concern! He’s moved up like 20 spots since his double bogey. He’s all the way up to 2nd.
(https://i.postimg.cc/WzPQz0KR/IMG-8642.jpg) (https://postimg.cc/BLMhwP4N)
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Morikawa with a hot back 9 tied for 2nd.
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Horschel puts up the worst round of the day. Lol. Jesus what a dick. EVERY. TIME.
Rory spinning his wheels, too. He’s semi-broken right now. Spent the last 30 years being a Fred Couples, Phil Mickelson, Rory fan. Not the easiest PGA Tour follows. A few great highs, a lot of really low lows.
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The week Horschel withdrew I played him largely because (well he was in excellent form) but I was adamant about breaking the curse. Lol blew up in my face spectacularly.
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Morikawa has made 6 straight birdies.
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A current snapshot of my lineups. Horschel holding me back bigly. I have him in 45% of my lineups (why would I do that to myself lol). The only golfer I have more invested in is Clark.
(https://i.postimg.cc/jS4kKvGP/IMG-8643.jpg) (https://postimg.cc/pmyBJQVL)
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Scheffler getting warm with back to back birdies.
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Horschel is literally the only asshole over par today. Lol
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This is probably my main $25 showdown lineup for Friday. Since it’s a small field, ownership is pretty heavy on most players so I left a considerable amount of “money on the table” ($1,500) in order to try to differentiate my lineup. Most people like to use all of their salary. Would prefer to leave closer to $800 or so, but I’m pretty happy with this lineup. “It’s not who you play, it’s how you play them.” I seriously considered putting Billy Horschel back in the lineup lol. His “bounceback” after a bad round is usually solid. This is a 50k to first contest.
(https://i.postimg.cc/wxbXm5yn/IMG-8648.jpg) (https://postimg.cc/7b0Jv2NN)
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You get 50k in salary cap, to use however you want. Typically If you play Scottie or Xander (especially Scottie) you’re picking a lot of scrubs.
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Horschel bogeys the 1st hole. Lol what an asshole
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Horschel bogeys the 1st hole. Lol what an asshole
He's just trying to fuck up your golf gambling or whatever. He's doing it on purpose.
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Fuck off.
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Fuck off.
Oh. Did Billy fuck you again? Darn. That sucks.
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Fuck you, bitch. That’s the response you want, right?
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Fuck you, bitch. That’s the response you want, right?
Don't be angry. Calm down big fella.
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You’re not significant enough to anger me, you cunt.
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You’re not significant enough to anger me, you cunt.
Yeah, you seem super calm and rational.
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If I’m angry, why am I laughing? Oh, I’m laughing at your extreme level of pettiness.
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Yeah, you seem super calm and rational.
Yeah, the guy who says he’s “super sensitive to images of women being brutalized” but has a bound, gagged, and kidnapped Hooter’s girl in his avatar and calls it a “super- light-hearted” joke seems like he’d be an expert on “rational.”
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If I’m angry, why am I laughing? Oh, I’m laughing at your extreme level of pettiness.
Oh, you're laughing? Sweet! I like making people laugh.
I honestly didn't know a url could be in a sig. I tried it and it worked. I'm guessing it won't stay there for long, because it's kinda annoying for others to have to scroll past it. So again, just calm the fuck down and stop calling me a cunt and whatever else.
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Yeah, the guy who says he’s “super sensitive to images of women being brutalized” but has a bound, gagged, and kidnapped Hooter’s girl in his avatar and calls it a “super- light-hearted” joke seems like he’d be an expert on “rational.”
Now you're getting it. Good!
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Now you're getting it. Good!
I get that you’re a miserable piece of shit. That’s it.
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I get that you’re a miserable piece of shit. That’s it.
Ok. Well, we can have a love hate relationship if you wish. You hate me, I love you. Sound good?
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What else can you put in a sig?
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What else can you put in a sig?
Good question. Probably any kind of pic.
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Good question. Probably any kind of pic.
That would be great if I could put that huge picture of Sid, Nancy, and Lemmy in my sig like I did for JimRomeisBurning at HQ. People bitched because the picture was so large.
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That would be great if I could put that huge picture of Sid, Nancy, and Lemmy in my sig like I did for JimRomeisBurning at HQ. People bitched because the picture was so large.
Yeah, I don't know. I'm not the expert on this shit.
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It's great that I can post while playing the video in your sig.
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It's great that I can post while playing the video in your sig.
Glad I could help.
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Seems like Jobu’s new med prescription is a mixed bag.
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Seems like Jobu’s new med prescription is a mixed bag.
Yeah, here's the thing. I have 3 prescriptions. One is for my heart. One is for gout. One is for plantar fasciitis.
Not on anything for anything else. Because I'm good. Thanks for your concern tho.
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You being “good” is highly debatable.
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Pretty awesome that the guy that randomly started a thread about squirrels in his yard is evaluating others on their mental health. But hey, if you feel better by doing that, go for it big fella!
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You being “good” is highly debatable.
You can debate it if you want. Hell, it's all good!
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Are squirrels associated with mental illness?
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Man, every time I post something, that video pops up. Amazing.
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I could be really brutal towards you right now, but I won’t. Because I’m not a piece of shit.
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Are squirrels associated with mental illness?
I don't believe so, and I don't believe I ever said that. What I was alluding to is that someone starting a random thread discussing the squirrels in his yard, which is actually a pretty normal occurrence, might have an issue or two. I mean, I see squirrels every day. I see deer, foxes, hell, even turkeys every now and then. I don't start threads about them. And as far as feeding them, they've been surviving in the wild this whole time, you really don't need to feed them at all. I get that you might like that, but they're fine.
Does that pretty much cover it? Or am I still mentally ill Dr. Freud? Like you have any fucking room to evaluate anybody's mental health, you piece of shit.
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I could be really brutal towards you right now, but I won’t. Because I’m not a piece of shit.
You are a piece of shit. Let's not sugar coat anything.
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I was just trying to have a light-hearted thread about something really random. Sorry if that bothered you.
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You are a piece of shit. Let's not sugar coat anything.
Possible. But you’re a far bigger one.
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Again, I could share some embarrassing shit for you, but I won’t because I’m not as big of a turd as you are.
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Possible. But you’re a far bigger one.
A piece of shit judging another. That's actually funny.
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Again, I could share some embarrassing shit for you, but I won’t because I’m not as big of a turd as you are.
You've already shared what you had, you dumb shit. I've shared that my sister was raped, I have been in therapy, and a number of other things. What else can you possibly throw out there that I might say, oh, no, Tempo, please don't share.
I'm not embarrassed by anything that you know. And you should be embarrassed by even saying that you could embarrass me you piece of shit.
Blackmail is a pretty low bar.
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A piece of shit judging another. That's actually funny.
You were looking to start another fight. You got what you wanted. Because you’re a recidivist. You’ll always be like this.
I’ve tried to be nice to you. It’s fucking pointless.
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I didn’t share it all.
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You've already shared what you had, you dumb shit. I've shared that my sister was raped, I have been in therapy, and a number of other things. What else can you possibly throw out there that I might say, oh, no, Tempo, please don't share.
I'm not embarrassed by anything that you know. And you should be embarrassed by even saying that you could embarrass me you piece of shit.
Blackmail is a pretty low bar.
You literally wanted to start a fight, and you got one. Cry more, pussy.
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You literally wanted to start a fight, and you got one. Cry more, pussy.
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I didn’t share it all.
Throw it all out there big guy. Since you're now into blackmail, let's see what you got. Hell, I double dog dare you.
No, I triple dog dare you.
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You literally wanted to start a fight, and you got one. Cry more, pussy.
Seriously? Bring the shit you supposedly have.
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Throw it all out there big guy. Since you're now into blackmail, let's see what you got. Hell, I double dog dare you.
No, I triple dog dare you.
Fuck you.
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I’ve bent over backwards to be nice to you and you shit on me. Fuck you, you’re a bag of smelly shit.
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For the benefit of all on here, I was having some issues a little while back. My sister, who is no longer with us and may her soul rest in peace, was raped. Long story short, she committed suicide. A little while back, Tempo shared a pic that looked like a woman getting raped, at least to me. It triggered some things inside of me, and I had to take a step back from here for a bit. I am not going to lie, I've been in therapy, and I deal with some issues from time to time. Now, Tempo here wants to say he has some other weird shit that he can share about me. Not sure what that might be, but whatever. Anyway, I'll just pass on that if you have issues and are dealing with shit, get the help you need. Don't be ashamed of it, and don't allow pieces of shit like Tempo put stigmas on it. Do what is best for you.
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I’ve bent over backwards to be nice to you and you shit on me. Fuck you, you’re a bag of smelly shit.
You didn't do shit. You wanted me to talk to you about my personal shit so you could hold it against me at a later time. I'm not stupid. Hell, you just now tried to tell people on here that you know shit about me and were trying to blackmail me. So fuck off. Seriously.
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Good job of making yourself look like the saint.
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You didn't do shit. You wanted me to talk to you about my personal shit so you could hold it against me at a later time. I'm not stupid. Hell, you just now tried to tell people on here that you know shit about me and were trying to blackmail me. So fuck off. Seriously.
You are a seriously fucked up person if you think that’s why I gave you my phone number and asked you to call or text me every day for a week.
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Good job of making yourself look like the saint.
I spoke facts. So, tell us squirrelking. What do you have on me?
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What a demented fucking thought. I’ve been nice to you, you just can’t help yourself. You started this shit today (as usual). I’ve done nothing to you to deserve you going after me.
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You are a seriously fucked up person if you think that’s why I gave you my phone number and asked you to call or text me every day for a week.
Yeah, see, I don't trust anyone. Especially you. I don't give out my number. And, god forbid, if I would have, look where I would be now.
You didn't give a shit, not in real life. If you did, you wouldn't have brought it up again the other day. But you did. So, fuck you.
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What a demented fucking thought. I’ve been nice to you, you just can’t help yourself. You started this shit today (as usual). I’ve done nothing to you to deserve you going after me.
Come on with the blackmail bitch. Share it. I'm actually curious.
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There's a reason I don't trust anybody. And I'll just leave it at that.
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The ONLY reason I said that is because you WILL NOT STOP. You are constantly seeking fights. I’ve done nothing to you recently that deserved you going after me and adding that stupid video to your sig 5 months later. Your petty fucking boner for me is disturbing.
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The ONLY reason I said that is because you WILL NOT STOP. You are constantly seeking fights. I’ve done nothing to you recently that deserved you going after me and adding that stupid video to your sig 5 months later. Your petty fucking boner for me is disturbing.
Nothing I have done compares to trying to blackmail someone. Sorry bitch.
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Yeah, see, I don't trust anyone. Especially you. I don't give out my number. And, god forbid, if I would have, look where I would be now.
You didn't give a shit, not in real life. If you did, you wouldn't have brought it up again the other day. But you did. So, fuck you.
Because you keep looking for fights. You literally started multiple threads with my name and likeness trying to make fun of me. You act like you’re some kind of innocent victim. You’re the instigator fuckwad, not me.
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Did it ever occur to you if you didn’t constantly attack me, maybe I wouldn’t attack you back?
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Because you keep looking for fights. You literally started multiple threads with my name and likeness trying to make fun of me. You act like you’re some kind of innocent victim. You’re the instigator fuckwad, not me.
I'm not an innocent victim at all. And yes, I've done plenty of instigating. But I've never come back with blackmail for shit that was posted on pm. That's just weird. And that's why I divulged everything to everyone here just now. I didn't necessarily want to, but here we are with it.
Again, everyone, I had a sister that was raped and she fucking killed herself. I have issues sometimes because of it. I'm screaming it from the mountaintops now. She's dead! I'm fucked up! But it is what it is. And Tempo is mad at me and was trying to blackmail me for some weird reason, and now you all fucking know.
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Did it ever occur to you if you didn’t constantly attack me, maybe I wouldn’t attack you back?
I don't constantly attack you. Sorry. Even if I did, that's no excuse for trying to blackmail me. Especially when it comes to what I chose to share in private messages. It's obvious, however, that you don't keep that kind of shit private, and in fact, you try to use that information to blackmail people. That's garbage, man.
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I don't constantly attack you. Sorry. Even if I did, that's no excuse for trying to blackmail me.
You never fucking stop. There was no reason for you to go after me today. But you did. Because you want it this way.
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You never fucking stop. There was no reason for you to go after me today. But you did. Because you want it this way.
Nah. You're a piece of shit blackmailer. Let's not pretend that you're something that you're not.
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Nah. You're a piece of shit blackmailer. Let's not pretend that you're something that you're not.
And you’re a mental case. Let’s not pretend you’re something that you’re not.
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And you’re a mental case. Let’s not pretend you’re something that you’re not.
Whatever you say, you blackmailing piece of shit.
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All you’d have to do to avoid this shit is not take my name, likeness, draw dicks to my mouth, starting multiple threads about how I like to suck cock. And I even overlooked that. That shit has been up for like probably two weeks.
But you just HAD to come after me today for no reason. Other than you needed this to feel alive I guess. IDFK
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All you’d have to do to avoid this shit is not take my name, likeness, draw dicks to my mouth, starting multiple threads about how I like to suck cock. And I even overlooked that. That shit has been up for like probably two weeks.
But you just HAD to come after me today for no reason. Other than you needed this to feel alive I guess. IDFK
Yeah. And you had to try to blackmail me like some piece of shit.
Fuck you, Tempo. I’m really glad I didn’t trust you.
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well that escalated quickly!
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well that escalated quickly!
Ernest is angry. It happens
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To be fair - why aren't you just doing this thread on RotoGrinders instead?
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I could be really brutal towards you right now, but I won’t. Because I’m not a piece of shit.
This is not blackmail. Specifically saying you won’t do something is sort of the opposite of blackmail.
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This is not blackmail. Specifically saying you won’t do something is sort of the opposite of blackmail.
That was a threat. Period.
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Is Billy Horschel still a twat?
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It’s your daughter’s birthday weekend, go pay attention to her you strokewad.
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Is Billy Horschel still a twat?
Yes.
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I don’t give a fuck what your pussy ass feelings thinks it was. I said multiple times I’d never do it. I’ve tried really hard to be your friend. You aren’t having it, plain and simple. Fuck off.
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Great stuff here guys
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Great stuff here guys
Isn’t it?! Better not joke about Billy Horschel making another bogey, might push Jobu over the edge…
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Pre-emptive Billy Horschel probably played like shit today post, just to get it out of the way!
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Pre-emptive Billy Horschel probably played like shit today post, just to get it out of the way!
Hahahahahahaha he decided bogey wasn’t bad enough for the 1st hole and doubled it.
(https://i.postimg.cc/Kvxh99pz/IMG-8663.jpg) (https://postimg.cc/23ctyxDR)
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Yes, he’s still a twat.
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Although im sure he’s a good dude. Still a twat.
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Looked like he had a good day in whatever professional golf match is going on across The Pond.
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This exchange has gotten a lot of attention the last 24 hours.
https://x.com/cpowers14/status/1836402331853721621?s=46&t=taZJ_d5ITWr6Hq3PUZDUiQ
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Looking at Tom Holland’s swing and divot track it’s pretty clear he can play.
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This exchange has gotten a lot of attention the last 24 hours.
https://x.com/cpowers14/status/1836402331853721621?s=46&t=taZJ_d5ITWr6Hq3PUZDUiQ
From who?
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https://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/golf/billy-horschel-happy-gilmore-wentworth-33722015.amp
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HabitualComplainer and Rick Majerus are also fed up with Billy Horschel!
(https://i.postimg.cc/zLTryMY0/IMG-8932.jpg) (https://postimg.cc/zLTryMY0) (https://i.postimg.cc/jWHpx7y1/IMG-8933.jpg) (https://postimg.cc/jWHpx7y1)
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The Horschel!
(https://i.postimg.cc/d0Fzrr6b/IMG-8934.jpg) (https://postimg.cc/Xr2H0ZTL)
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Rick Majerus tweeting from beyond the grave.
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Rick Majerus tweeting from beyond the grave.
and will always be remembered for this classic
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9RXaERVhNuU
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and will always be remembered for this classic
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9RXaERVhNuU
And for taking a dump in a towel during a halftime speech