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Hey Tempo! Illini - WIU Leathernecks Fri 8/29 at 630PM!

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ThePAMan

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Hey Tempo! Illini - WIU Leathernecks Fri 8/29 at 630PM!
« on: August 25, 2025, 01:01:10 PM »
As usual, all stuff stolen from fightingillini.com except as noted.....

Who: #12 [!] Illinois vs. Western Illinois
Date/Time: Friday, Aug. 29 | 6:30 p.m. CT [Supposed to be a nice night weather wise!]
Location:   Champaign, Illinois (Memorial Stadium) [Obligatory - Drive to Champaign, Judge Judy, not Macomb!]
Tickets:   FightingIllini.com
TV:   Peacock (subscription information)
Radio:   Busey Bank Illini Sports Network | Listen | SiriusXM (121/195), SXM App

Illinois is ranked #12 in the Preseason AP Top 25 and the Preseason US LBM Coaches Poll, the program's highest preseason ranking since 1990 [SAD!], when the Illini started #11 in the Preseason AP Top 25.

Illinois returns 16 [Heard AlionEye's podcast and he claimed 17] starters from last season — tied for the most in the nation — and 18 starters from last year's Cheez-It Citrus Bowl team that finished #16 in the final AP Poll. Last year's team tied the program record for wins with 10 and tied the program record for ranked wins with four. The Fighting Illini capped one of the best seasons in program history by beating #14 South Carolina in the Cheez-It Citrus Bowl, 21-17, in one of the top bowl game victories in Illinois history.

Among the returners are QB Luke Altmyer and OLB Gabe Jacas, who were voted by the media to the Big Ten's Preseason Honors list of the top 15 players in the conference. Jacas had 74 tackles, 13.0 tackles for loss, and 8.0 sacks last season to lead the Illinois defense, while Altmyer threw for 2,717 yards and 22 touchdowns in 2024.

The Illini and Leathernecks will square off for the fourth time on Friday in their first matchup since 2018. Illinois leads the all-time series, 3-0, with all three games occurring at Memorial Stadium. [Yay us!]

Paul Burmeister (play-by-play), Phil Simms (analyst) [HAHAHAHAHAHA!], and Zora Stephenson (reporter) have the television broadcast on Peacock. The Busey Bank Illini Sports Network has the radio call with Brian Barnhart [zzzzzzzzzzz], Carey Davis, and Michael Martin.

Welcome to the 2025 College Football Season
• Illinois opens its 136th season of [mostly shitty!] football on Friday against Western Illinois.
• Illinois opens the season at Memorial Stadium for the fifth straight season and the 14th time in the last 15 seasons (2020 at Wisconsin).
• Illinois hosts Western Illinois for the fourth time in program history and the first time since 2018.
• Illinois enters 2025 on a four-game winning streak, tied for the longest active streak in the Big Ten with reigning national champion Ohio State. [Great stat for us!]

Illinois in the Rankings
• Illinois is ranked #12 in the Preseason AP Top 25 and the Preseason US LBM Coaches Poll.
• Illinois has its highest preseason ranking since 1990, when the Illini started #11 in the Preseason AP Top 25.
• Illinois is ranked in the Preseason AP Top 25 and the Preseason Coaches Poll for the first time since 2008. [JFC]
• Illinois' #12 preseason ranking is the ninth-highest in program history since the AP Preseason Poll began in 1950. [WOW! We suck historically!]
• Illinois' #12 Preseason Coaches Poll ranking is tied for the second-highest in program history since the Preseason Coaches Poll began in 1978, behind only Illini teams in 1985 (#10) and 1990 (#12). [Keep your cups firmly on! May want to double up!]
• Illinois was #16 in last year's final AP Top 25 poll, the program's highest final ranking since finishing #12 in 2001.

Familiar Faces
• Illinois returns 18 starters from its Cheez-It Citrus Bowl victory over #14 South Carolina, tied with Michigan for the most returning starters of any bowl team in the nation. [Which means, enjoy it while you can as next year could be oooooofffff]
• Illinois returns 16 season starters from last year's 10-win campaign, which is tied with Arizona State, Clemson, and Penn State for the most returning starters in the nation. Alabama, Boise State, Duke, San Diego State, and Texas A&M are next with 14 returning season starters. [CFP Championship, here we come!]
• Illinois offensive coordinator Barry Lunney Jr., who returns for his fourth season, is the longest-tenured offensive coordinator in the Big Ten. [Basically, he cannot find a promotion elsewhere?]
• Illinois defensive coordinator Aaron Henry, who returns for his third season, is the third-longest-tenured defensive coordinator in the Big Ten behind only Iowa's Phil Parker (14th season) and Oregon's Tosh Lupoi (fourth season). [Same...]
• Illinois is the only Power-4 team to return its offensive coordinator, defensive coordinator, and starting quarterback for a third straight season in 2025. [I am NOT taking off the cup!]
• Illinois was the only Big Ten team to have the same head coach, offensive coordinator, defensive coordinator, strength coach, and starting quarterback in 2023 and 2024. All five are back again for 2025.
• Illinois is one of six Big Ten teams to return both its offensive and defensive coordinators in 2025, along with Indiana, Iowa, Michigan State, Northwestern, and Oregon. [Really reaching for content here....]
• Illinois and Oregon are the only Big Ten teams to return both their offensive and defensive coordinator for at least the third straight season. [Tempo, they are comparing Illinois to Oregon!]
• Illinois returns nine of its 10 primary position coaches. [Tight job market...Thanks Trump!]

Attendance Growth
• Illinois announced on May 21 that its season tickets had sold out for the first time in at least 20 years. [SAD!]
• The Fighting Illini's final season ticket total for kickoff against Western Illinois is over 42,000.
• Student season tickets sold out on Aug. 18.
• Illinois' Oct. 11 matchup against Ohio State sold out on Aug. 6. [2/3 of the crowd will be Buckeye fans. Book it!]
• Over the last four seasons, Illinois has experienced the largest growth in attendance in the nation and the largest growth in the Big Ten by a wide margin. Average attendance increased by nearly 20,000 from 2021 to 2024, ranking Illinois #1 in the nation in three-year growth (+19,403 average attendance gained) and #9 in the nation in percentage growth (+54.89% attendance increase). [HAHAHA. Hard to go down from where they were.]

The Bielema Era [aka Illinois Really Sucked Ass for a Long Time]
• Bret Bielema is 28-22 during his Illinois career. Since Robert Zuppke went undefeated in two of his first three seasons at Illinois from 1913-15, Bielema's 28-22 start is the second-best through 50 games by an Illini head coach, behind only Mike White (30-19-1, 1980-84). [Tempo says he is "trash." I am still not sold....Hope I am wrong!]
• Bielema has won at least eight games in two of his first four seasons at Illinois, becoming the first Illini head coach since John Mackovic (1988-91) to reach eight wins twice in his first four seasons in Champaign.
• Bielema's 18 Big Ten wins through his first four seasons at Illinois are the most since John Mackovic won 22 in his first four seasons from 1988-91.
• Bielema's six ranked wins (AP/Coaches/CFP) during his first four seasons are the second-most in program history, behind only John Mackovic (8, 1988-91).
• Bielema's four road/neutral ranked wins (AP/Coaches/CFP) are the most of any coach in Illini history during his first four seasons in Champaign.
• Bielema has had the Illini ranked in 17 AP polls during his first four seasons in Champaign. Only John Mackovic (39 weeks, 1988-91) had the Illini ranked more during their first four seasons as Illinois head coaches.
• Bielema joined John Mackovic (1988-91) and Lou Tepper (1992-95) [ugh...Coach Death Penalty] as the only head coaches in Illinois history to win 5+ games in each of their first four seasons leading the Fighting Illini.
• Bielema is 10-8 in Big Ten road games at Illinois. His 10 Big Ten road wins are tied for the second-most by an Illini head coach in his first four seasons, behind only Mike White (11, 1980-83) and tied with Lou Tepper (10, 1992-95) and John Mackovic (10, 1988-91).

The Illinois-Western Illinois Series and Connections
• Illinois leads the all-time series against Western Illinois, 3-0. [Suck it Leathernecks!]
• Illinois assistant head coach/running backs coach Thad Ward was the running backs coach at Western Illinois from 2005-10.
• Illinois senior analyst Myers Hendrickson played college football at Western Illinois from 2008-11 was the head coach at Western Illinois from 2022-23. His father, Mark Hendrickson, was on staff at Western Illinois from 1999-2012 as the program's offensive coordinator (1999-2007) and head coach (2008-12).
• Bret Bielema's second career win as a head coach was against Western Illinois, a 34-10 for his Wisconsin Badgers on Sept. 9, 2006.

I will be in Lot 46...bumped from Lot 45 from last year - boooooo, but an extra beer for the walk may make up for it! Judge Judy will amble over to Lot 46 from Lot 49 on Friday.

Who else is going? alum74? Beach Bum (You can meet Jobu!)? Breal31? Jasn? Chickengeorge? Cinimod? Custard? Dick Assman? DoctorIntheFlat? driver8? FidoMcCokefiend? Robb? Gokuwearsorange/blue? Groucho007? Hal9000? IhaveB1Gpenis? illinicalvin? ILLINICHIEF? IlliniGolf? illinikvn? illiniray? illinismitty? QAnon1997? jayboek? Jobu? Jrock74 [didn't he call me a fag for being right on the college challenge rule?]?       
Lanphier [from the grave?]? Lkdog [or was it LKdog who called me a fag? I cannot remember all the people who have called me a fag here]? Mike Florio? Miles Leonard? Miniditka [still alive?] murphstahoe [riding your bike here as I post?]? No one in Mn [Gone fishin']? orangekrush117? OskeeWowWoe? grange? sidra1968? SlatsGrobnik? SoCal Illini? spark mandrill/spark mandrilll? sven? ThePeeAMan [Man, does Tempo have a lot of mults]? TheRealJeffFrank [probably at some shitty jam band concert]? V-A-G-I-N-I? Wetwetpussy? wewillwint? wonky73?

Go Illini.

Mark Carman: "The Whitlock!...Caleb Williams failed Wayne Whitlock." Been told I need to take my dick out my mouth so maybe I "wont [sic] sound like such a fucking faggot all the time[.]"

Tempo: "PAMan is a pot stirrer and agent provocateur"

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Hal9000

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Re: Hey Tempo! Illini - WIU Leathernecks Fri 8/29 at 630PM!
« Reply #1 on: August 25, 2025, 01:18:23 PM »
The poster would be wise in the future to heed this advice concerning what passes for humor...

Humor is complex, but most things that make us laugh share some common elements. Psychologists and philosophers have proposed several main theories:

Incongruity – Something is funny when it violates our expectations in a surprising or clever way. Example: a punchline that takes a story in an unexpected direction.

Superiority – We laugh when we feel a sense of triumph or superiority over others’ mistakes, flaws, or misfortunes. Example: slapstick or roasting someone.

Relief – Humor can release built-up tension or taboo feelings in a safe way. Example: joking about a stressful situation to ease anxiety.

Benign Violation Theory – A newer concept: something is funny when it’s wrong or a little “off” (a violation of norms), but still harmless or acceptable. Example: a baby swearing might be shocking, but funny because it’s harmless.

Other factors matter too:

Timing and delivery – A perfectly timed pause can make a joke land.

Relatability – Humor works best when people share the same context or experience.

Surprise and brevity – The brain enjoys quick, unexpected twists.
Just what do you think you're doing, illiniray?

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ThePAMan

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Re: Hey Tempo! Illini - WIU Leathernecks Fri 8/29 at 630PM!
« Reply #2 on: August 25, 2025, 01:27:46 PM »
I will be sure to consult you next time, Hal.

I forgot the most important part! Betting! VSin had nothing! Fucking Brent Musberger! From some other site:

Western Illinois            +45.5/-115; +45.5/-115; +45/-107; +45/-108; +45/-108
Illinois Fighting Illini      -45.5/-105; -45.5/-105; -45/-114; -45/-115; -45/-115

All had:
o63.5/-110
u63.5/-110

No moneylines...
Mark Carman: "The Whitlock!...Caleb Williams failed Wayne Whitlock." Been told I need to take my dick out my mouth so maybe I "wont [sic] sound like such a fucking faggot all the time[.]"

Tempo: "PAMan is a pot stirrer and agent provocateur"

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ILLove1997

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Re: Hey Tempo! Illini - WIU Leathernecks Fri 8/29 at 630PM!
« Reply #3 on: August 25, 2025, 01:33:08 PM »
Thanks for the thread harv
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ThePAMan

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Re: Hey Tempo! Illini - WIU Leathernecks Fri 8/29 at 630PM!
« Reply #4 on: August 25, 2025, 02:43:18 PM »
Thanks, Trump!

University of Illinois Division of Public Safety and the Division of Intercollegiate Athletics have added walk-through metal detection systems to all Memorial Stadium entrances. With season tickets sold out for the first time in more than 20 years, record crowds are expected, and keeping fans safe is a top priority.

Fans visiting Memorial Stadium will have a similar entry experience to other major professional and collegiate sports venues around the United States. Fans will keep their belongings with them while passing through the upgraded metal detection system, and anyone who triggers an alarm will receive a secondary check with a handheld security wand.

While the metal detection system is effective and supported by security experts, certain items such as sunglasses cases and stadium seats may still set off an alarm. To avoid delays, fans should place items such as stadium seats aside as directed by security staff before walking through the detector.
Mark Carman: "The Whitlock!...Caleb Williams failed Wayne Whitlock." Been told I need to take my dick out my mouth so maybe I "wont [sic] sound like such a fucking faggot all the time[.]"

Tempo: "PAMan is a pot stirrer and agent provocateur"

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Somewhere in Mn

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Re: Hey Tempo! Illini - WIU Leathernecks Fri 8/29 at 630PM!
« Reply #5 on: August 25, 2025, 03:07:47 PM »
Thanks, Trump!

University of Illinois Division of Public Safety and the Division of Intercollegiate Athletics have added walk-through metal detection systems to all Memorial Stadium entrances. With season tickets sold out for the first time in more than 20 years, record crowds are expected, and keeping fans safe is a top priority.

Fans visiting Memorial Stadium will have a similar entry experience to other major professional and collegiate sports venues around the United States. Fans will keep their belongings with them while passing through the upgraded metal detection system, and anyone who triggers an alarm will receive a secondary check with a handheld security wand.

While the metal detection system is effective and supported by security experts, certain items such as sunglasses cases and stadium seats may still set off an alarm. To avoid delays, fans should place items such as stadium seats aside as directed by security staff before walking through the detector.

You can't put a couple of beers inside your binoculars case ?

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Custard

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Re: Hey Tempo! Illini - WIU Leathernecks Fri 8/29 at 630PM!
« Reply #6 on: August 26, 2025, 12:06:37 AM »
The line on this seems nuts. Hard to believe we’d leave starters in up 40 some to an in state school. I think you hammer the under on this one but still get a comfy win.
Poster Boy for White Male Indifference

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“Custard, you were RIGHT!” -Tempo

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Jobu

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Re: Hey Tempo! Illini - WIU Leathernecks Fri 8/29 at 630PM!
« Reply #7 on: August 26, 2025, 07:56:51 AM »
I feel like a top 5 8A high school team in Illinois could hang with, if not beat Western.
Fucking coward. Don’t fucking snipe me you fucking…KIKE BITCH! - Meyers Leonard
Caleb Williams failed Wayne Whitlock. Priorities?!

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Judge Judy

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Re: Hey Tempo! Illini - WIU Leathernecks Fri 8/29 at 630PM!
« Reply #8 on: August 26, 2025, 09:35:19 AM »
The line on this seems nuts. Hard to believe we’d leave starters in up 40 some to an in state school. I think you hammer the under on this one but still get a comfy win.

I think it’ll be over just because Bielema knows a CFP berth is on the line. Just try and destroy everybody you can to better your chances. Leave nothing to doubt or suspicion…
Because FOX News told me so…

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Somewhere in Mn

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Re: Hey Tempo! Illini - WIU Leathernecks Fri 8/29 at 630PM!
« Reply #9 on: August 26, 2025, 09:48:31 AM »
I think it’ll be over just because Bielema knows a CFP berth is on the line. Just try and destroy everybody you can to better your chances. Leave nothing to doubt or suspicion…
That hasn't been our MO but I wouldn't be surprised if it is this year.

Anything 30 and above would be ok if we make up for it by winning at Dook by more than the spread.

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Judge Judy

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Re: Hey Tempo! Illini - WIU Leathernecks Fri 8/29 at 630PM!
« Reply #10 on: August 26, 2025, 09:58:37 AM »
That hasn't been our MO but I wouldn't be surprised if it is this year.

Anything 30 and above would be ok if we make up for it by winning at Dook by more than the spread.

Agreed. Just feels like we have everything to gain as a program and recruiting if we go all out. Play or take it easy on people isn’t how dominating and great programs operate. It is time to be the asshole bully. Do that this year and it sets us up for years and years to come.
Because FOX News told me so…

HQ2 Cesspool March Madness champion 🏆

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ILLove1997

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Re: Hey Tempo! Illini - WIU Leathernecks Fri 8/29 at 630PM!
« Reply #11 on: August 26, 2025, 12:32:26 PM »
The line on this seems nuts. Hard to believe we’d leave starters in up 40 some to an in state school. I think you hammer the under on this one but still get a comfy win.

The eastern game last year we were 35 point favorites or something and we won 45-0  🤷‍♂️

but I am the worst sports better ever so do the opposite of me
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Miles Leonard

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Re: Hey Tempo! Illini - WIU Leathernecks Fri 8/29 at 630PM!
« Reply #12 on: August 26, 2025, 04:35:02 PM »
Football is back!

But they just had to ruin it with Peacock 🤢
Official winner of the HQ Tallest Midget award. Thanks, Jobu!

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Somewhere in Mn

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Re: Hey Tempo! Illini - WIU Leathernecks Fri 8/29 at 630PM!
« Reply #13 on: August 29, 2025, 07:04:32 PM »
Replay missed that call

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Somewhere in Mn

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Re: Hey Tempo! Illini - WIU Leathernecks Fri 8/29 at 630PM!
« Reply #14 on: August 29, 2025, 07:17:22 PM »
Aaron Henry is 3rd most tenured Big10 DC is a little hard to believe.
Hal, is this true ?